If I Were An Insect With Eight Legs....

Thanks a lot, Ross. It's all YOUR fault Spiders are trying to take over the world!


If I were and insect with eight legs... would you scream like an idiot and leap up wildly? Yes. And Yes again. I had a close call the other day. You know, sometimes you just gotta be brave in your line of duty. And that means risks. It all started watching a strange movie I call "Commandments". It's a good movie, however it does involve someone coming out of a dead whale and then just afterwards without showering, making out with another person. However this is all well and good, or so it may have been if not for The Spider. Lying quietly thinking my thoughts, watching the movie, with a cat at my side, I felt a little ticka ticka crawly crawly on my arm. I thought this was none other than the whiskers of Cali close by. However I looked down and saw instead a humongous black shadow heading down my forearm. "Arrrrgggghh!" I shrieked with terror. Cali ran away, sheets flying everywhere... the neighbor next door murmured audibly to her houseguest, "Did you hear THAT?" Quite distraught I ran and sought the help of a fellow member of my dwelling who with much effort managed to aid me in locating said beast as it attempted to hide and then later kill me.

After The Spider was out of my room I still felt uneasy. What if there were more spiders? What if there were MANY more spiders? That was a close call. Somehow I made it through the night and it seemed at least for the time being... that I was safe from the clutches of spiderdom. However, as I am writing this and glancing nervously towards my bed I fear I may be provoking the wrath of the unsuccessful spider. Will it be back? Will it attack AGAIN? Only time will tell....