Sunday, June 17, 2007

"Lost" and Confused!





Do you ever have one of those days where like stuff is so wack, that ya can’t even hear the voices in your head? Yeah? Well me too!
I can-not believe that I ain’t even been on here in like forevers. That’s just because someone around here stopped time. But luckily I found a way to turn it back on. (Too bad you can’t just get a clapper for that, huh?)

Now, everybody talks all cool like don’t they? Ya know what are da kids into these dizzays? I should know for real but it be da summer time, fool! I plum, hee-hee, forgot to do a May entry, I probably coulda, but I plum forgot. No, I didn’t apple forget or banana forget or grape forget. Like I said I plum forgot.

If it makes you feel n-e betta, I iz a film maker now. I made like ten really wicked videos, but I could only upload the shortest ones because like several other people in 2007 America, I have dial-up still. Hey, don’t just stare at me like I sez I still use cassettes or somethin’. I’m just old school cool is all I’m sayin’. But the point is, I will have high-speed access dis coming summer time yo, cause I got like dis connection of the ‘net over in the ‘Lu! No, not that type of “lu”. I mean the Honolulu, for real. I’m makin’ myself a little cameo over on the University of HI, Manoa campus in week or two. Yea!

I been busy with my other schoolin’, and I ain’t foolin’. (Okay I won’t quit my day job.) (As if I had one, haha.) I been workin’ at SEALAB once again ya know, hangin’ with my favorite lobstas and crabs, and takin’ care of the wee plants out back. I did some finals, too. Stress? As-if. Okay, there was some stress, but that’s the way of the whatever. I went out to Julian, I did, I went all about in ma new CAR! Which I DRIVE. And they all say, they says to me, “That’s a pretty sweet ride.” And I say, “Hell yeah it’s cool, and better yet it was on sale!” So it makes up for the fact that I is technologically challenged in da house. But it doesn’t matter.

iTunes is having a bit of a fight with me right now, see it doesn’t want me to listen to music, I mean who’da thought iTunes was for music? The people at the store sure seemed surprised to learn that! “Well see, we’d like to help you... er...uh... we could... but let’s just say.... we’re not going to....” Basically since I got a PC it’s like screw me. But they never said that it would not compute with dee little podzilla thingy. They’re part of The Others, I am sure of it. And that reminds me, have you seen Sawyers hair lately? I mean bloody hell brother, you’d look waaaaay better if ya just washed it. I mean Sayid washes his hair. And all of y’all are supposedly on the same island. I keep feeling like “Lost” in a sea of overpriced sandwiches and bad coffee and the mess of the room, I live in it, I mean it’s kind of like the hatch but easier to get into, the music is almost as weird, but not quite.

I chill up in PV (dats short for Palos Verdes, yo) and I pretends that I’m da awesomest club memba of Trump Golf, yo! I use the bathrooms there and drink ice tea and there’s this sign with Trump on it saying “He’ll be glad to see me on the course.” And it’s soo obvious that he’d probably scream if he saw ME on the course. Probably because I’m so cool and all, not really a memba, but it might have something to do with the fact that my bro and I we were chanting, “4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42...” over and over and people were asking among themselves “Is it performance art? Crazy people? A show?” hahahah. And singin’ “You All Everybody” And this weird lady with a funny blue sparkle hat looked at us like “I do say, WTF?” A parasail dude came dangerously close to my head and that’s when I thought to myself, what if Hurley is like right about the numbers? But then I remembered that it’s just a show? Or is it....

People are so freakin’ annoying, I mean they are mean to you, then they misunderstand you, then they point and stare, then they come at you with pitchforks speaking in tongues, what is wrong with the world today? Too much ADD medication, too much ED? And if “Happy Bob” tells me his *woooooooooop* is thankful about Makeitstandhopefullywithoutexplodingyourwangenal just one more time.... I’m gonna prescribe
his ass off the planet!

I wish Jack was my doctor, he’s all cool, you know unless you’re having a baby or anything then you’re on your own. Oh right, that’s something from “Lost”. Can you see why I’m confused? They made my life into this bizarre show! They films in ma hang-out first of all, (H-I yo!) But the freaky thing is they know all this stuff that happens in my life. Just the other day, I was on my way to the store when I was running through the jungle and I shoot a polar bear trying to steal my parking space and so I stop to make a crib out of rendered animal fat and bamboo but sadly I tripped over the hatch. So I never got to get any soy-burgers and stuff, it sucked. Then I see almost the same thing of it on TV and I’m like, hey ain’t that like cheating or something? So yes, “Lost” IS a reality show. But it’s more easy to be obsessed with something when it’s so close to reality. I mean, so close... it’s scary.

But you know who I probably don’t want on the show anymore is Joaquin Phoenix. See I was thinking of all these people who could be on the show, you know, for like more people, but anyway... The thing is cause Sayid would probably just kill him or they’d fight over the liquor or some crap and then Walt would say “Why can’t I drink the sea water?” and everyone would stare blankly. But I don’t know, at least he’s visible unlike Jacob, (who is really my brother Randall... looooong story, but I’m afraid I can’t tell you that anyway.) The bottom line is why the hell does anyone want to see “Transformers” it’s a movie about toys that turn into other toys.
I was watching “Entourage” in my hatch the other day and I was thinking what would it be like if “Lost” and “Entourage” were a dual-series? Adrian Grenier could be really useful because unlike Sawyer, he seems to wash his hair. I don’t want you to think that I’m bashin’ ma main home dog Sawyer, it’s just when he pull back his hair he looks like a samurai or something odd. But I have to hand it to him for making even more weird bargains than me, (which is also based on my life), because I have NEVER started a sentence out loud without the words “I got a proposition for ya”. Sigh... I wish they’d stop ripping off my life!

But my company, VIDEOTHING, (Very Important Demonstrative Experiment of The Human Initiative Negotiation Gah), has a secret video that will answer many questions! (Or possibly just trigger many deep-laden brain disorders.) Whatever the matter do check it out... you must. Hahaha. Anyway, peace out fo now. I needed to cross this blog off my list of things to mind this week. Because of course it is very, very, very, very, very, very, very important! Just stop acting like stupid people wearing expensive clothes! You All Everybody!

VISIT:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l2MkHkbgzik


Come on, brother, or you'll blow up the bloody hatch! Oh right, it already blew up.

4 8 15 16 23 42 4 8 15 16 23 42 4 8 15 16 23 42 4 8 15 16 23 42 4 8 15 16 23 42 4 8 15 1 6 23 42