Previously Recorded Material

I thought tonight before I went to bed, I would share some previously "recorded" unreleased material of mine from various forms and venues. All rights reserved!! Would you like some macaroni and Kraft Brand all rights reserved TM copyright cheese?? FINE! As long as you read this entry of bizarre and bad pieces I've written. And yes! They are supposed to be like that! Geez...


This is a poem just for YOU! Whoever the hell you are...

You are the coolest thing since sliced bread!
It is so awesome that you are as awesome as you are!
Wow it is in fact quite extraordinary that anyone could possess the magic of ten thousand sharper image chairs!
Or the whimsy of a sand castle covered with sea weed!
But the sand crabs do not hide the beauty of your lovely eyes
That sparkle like diamonds on the edge of a trash can.
And if love were a bunch of rotting banana peels and diapers
I surely would be the happiest garbage collector in town.
Because I love your trash.
What a marvelous consumer you truly are.
Wasting and using.
The energy of a pimped out car,
The elevation of a really big billboard,
A fat guy singing!
A bird cawing loudly on the light pole.
A magical unicorn dancing across a movie screen for an anti-smoking ad
And all the half dead cowboys with tracheotomies
That is how freaking cool you are.



This next 'song' was featured on the very lovely www.mycathatesyou.com

It is an extraordinary hit entitled "Oh f**k I Dripped Mustard On My Shirt" I think it was covered by all the cool people but now you know where it really came from! My deep, deep, stupidity!

Oh F**k I Dripped Mustard On My Shirt

Life can be so complicated
When things seem to come regurgitated
From the tip of a yellow bottle

Oh, f**k me
Yes siree
I spilled some mustard on my shirt

Oh f**k
There goes that mustard dripping from the corners
Of my tortured mind

Life is just a sandwhich
And not every value meal comes with napkins
To tidy up the drippings
Of a hard long day

Oh F**k
Will I ever learn
That mustard was spicy and left a burn
A yellow spot
My favorite shirt

Oh f**k again,
I dripped mustard on my shirt

And finally....
A poem that isn't as bad as the others that I wrote in honor of the coming season!

Summertime

No more radiant than the blooms
following the month of June
when the flowers have nodded
And drfited from their fileds

And the summer heat is strong
And the days last so long
And the nights are filled with song
Summertime

What happened to the summertime
Summertime
It comes after
the winter and the cold
And the spring when nothings old
Summertime
Summertime
Summertime

Danke Schoen! Y'all come back! Don't just stand over there staring all the time! My shoes DO NOT stink! Anything can be a color if you try hard enough to make it so! I DO NOT HAVE A PROBLEM! Well... if I do, what's the problem with a problem anyway? It's only if your problem causes you problems that it becomes a problem!

In conclusion... random thoughts

The sunset thing for astronomy is dumb... but the sunset tonight was pretty.
Why do people never call me... I always have to call them
"I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed...."
Cali I love you
Even frogs think I'm too cool 4 school
Trump Golf has a nice beach
Beach!
NOOOO Spring Break is nearly done!

But it CAN'T BE!

A Twist of Fate Makes Life Worth While!
~Great Success~